Dear Swimming...

I decided it was time to get back to swimming today. For one thing, my morning was free. For a second thing, I haven't swam in quite some time, since two Fridays ago actually. So it had been two weeks, and it was time to get back to it. But in that time off, I've had some swimming reflection and decided I have something to say.

ahem.

Dear Swimming,
     Hi. I know it's been awhile. Two weeks to be exact. I'm sorry about that, but I needed some space. You were getting kind of clingy (or maybe that was just my suit). I'm not saying you pushed me away, but, I just needed to have some time with my pals Running and Cycling. Turns out Cycling wasn't really available, but Running and I have had some nice talks.
     It wasn't you, it was me.
     It's no secret I'm just not that good at you. I'm not that good at running or biking either. But I've gotten pretty comfortable with those activities and where I fit with them. Of course I'm always trying to get better, and I do beat myself up about things now and then. I get down that I can train so hard and still be slower in a 5K than a 90-year-old smoker carrying a large bear on her back while pushing a baby jogger filled with sacks of potatoes. Uphill. And I get frustrated that I can't run with people because I'm not fast enough to keep up. But, I keep doing it for many reasons, but mostly because I like it. For cycling, I feel like I have potential and I love it. My abilities aren't so far off from others', and that makes it pretty exciting.  
     And then, there was you.
     I didn't know anything about you when I attempted my first triathlon last year. I had dabbled in the pool a couple times, but didn't know how to swim properly. I watched YouTube videos about you and read articles on triathlon websites. I learned some drills and became friends with the pull buoy. I increased my number of days with you and finally started to see some small progress. And now, looking back to where I started, I realize I have made a lot of progress. Even from September of last year when I did my first swim-in-a-lake triathlon, I have made progress. I mean, I haven't choked on water in the middle of a set in like 5 weeks.
     You have made me stronger. You have helped my breathing and asthma (it seems). You have given me something to do when I can't do running and biking. And, most importantly, you have introduced me to all your senior friends at the community center who are perfectly content with floating on their backs...and always have a smile for me.
     And so, after some chatting with Running, I realized I like you a lot. I just hadn't been looking at you through the right pair of goggles.
     - cymbal crash -
     You and I...we work. And I'm going to stop trying to make you something you're not (Running or Cycling) and appreciate you for what you are (terrible terrible Swimming). And, I'll also appreciate me for where I fit with you now. I look forward to our future together!

Much love,
Steph